Wednesday, April 13, 2016

"What is an Empath? How do I know if I am an Empath?"

Dear Ms. Q,

“I read your post about being Clairvoyant and all that stuff, but I’m confused.  What do you mean that someone can be an Empath?   How do you know if you’re an Empath?”

Being an Empath or having sensitivity to people, places, animals can be a good thing and a bad thing if you do not know how to control this ablitiy.    Sometimes it leads to people having too many animals, having a relationship with a bully or abusive person because you “feel” you can change them, you can’t say ‘no’ because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.   Places and things bother you while to others they think you’re just nuts----well, you’re not.   You are an Empath.

But an Empath also has to be logical and grounded as well, has to learn to say ‘no’, has to know that there are people you can’t change or fix, you need to channel your empathic abilities into a constructive direction.

So here is a list to test yourself to see if you are an Empath:

You feel others’ pain

You sense others’ emotional state and feel it in your body.

You get strong first impressions of people that end up being spot-on or right on the mark.

You sense if someone is lying (Mothers are very good about this, so are cops)

You can’t watch the news

Sad movies are overwhelming

You feel physically sick at violence of any kind

You’re hyper-sensitive to noise

You’re hyper sensitive to bright lights

You’re hyper-aware of shifts in surroundings

You have a hard time saying “no” to people

You help so much you’re exhausted (but can’t stop helping)

You feel sick or shaky around certain people

You can’t seem to detach from someone in need, even when it’s for your best

You constantly attract “broken winged birds” (extremely needy people) or bullies in relationships

You are more aware of the suffering in the world than others

You have a deep need to make the world a better place.

It is hard for Non-Empaths to see what an Empath is seeing and to understand it but Empaths need logical and well balanced non-empaths so that the person who is Empathic is not losing themselves to a lost cause or situation, because if they are involved in that it can harm them physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

That is why it is important to say “no”, to network with agencies who help people and animals in need, and to make your own personal surroundings as comfortable as possible and to also be aware that not everyone will see, feel or do things the way you do, and that is where an Empath needs to work from the logical side of their personality or develop logical reasoning.

An over-board empath becomes what I call a “Tree-hugging Fluff Bunny” singing Kumbaiya and wearing sandals in freezing weather.  

Balance is what is needed,  and I should know because I myself experience much of what is listed here, and it took me years and the training of my Granny, my Parents and several mentors to help me develop the safeguards I needed to help me through life.   Not that I have come out of it unscathed, but with enough experience to know what not to do.

Now most people may feel a number of those things listed but not all of them, well that still makes you an empath but over time you’ve developed on your own some spiritual tricks to help protect yourself which is good.

Now there are things that you as an Empath or spiritual person can do, as a matter of fact even a normal person who is not that much of an Empath should do as well, to achieve balance and harmony in their life.

Tiffany Stiles came up with this list and I’ve seen it all over the internet and I’m posting it here with a few addition comments of my own in ( ).

They are you need to:

Set Boundaries  (Extremely important---don’ let anyone bulldoze you)

Balance and clear your throat chakra (important to be heard, do it frequently)

When you are upset, let your voice be heard.  (If you don’t speak up folks will run over you or take you for granted)

When you need help ask for it.  (you don’t have to do it all by yourself)

Steer clear of gossip and drama.  (if someone brings drama into your house, kick them out and tell them that you don’t need that in your life, if someone starts to gossip ask them to stop unless they were directly there to see if happen, if not then don’t tell lies)   You have no idea how important this is.

Do not watch the news.   (The only way news sells is if it’s negative, however if it’s something that impacts your commute, like a transit strike, well you do need to be informed, there are people who are news junkies, and that can be poisonous to one’s mental health)

Steer clear of narcissistic personalities.  They feed off of Empaths. (they are also known as psychic vampires---see also steering clear of gossip and drama---you will know when you’re near a psychic vampire because you feel drained all day after encountering them)

Ground your energy with Earth Daily.

Meditate.  (this is very helpful and relieves stress,  you can also do this to check in with your chakra’s to make sure they are in balance)

Be in Nature.  ( a walk in a park or a public garden is always reviving, if you are afraid of going alone have a good and understand friend go with you, have a mini-picnic if you like,  soak up a little Vitamin D for 20 minutes from the Sun---but don’t get a sun burn)

Spend 1 hour alone to recharge your batteries. (make that an absolute rule, set it for the same time day or evening, if you have kids, get a friend to baby sit them for that hour---when I was working I had a long commute to work, so I would car pool with friends but they would leave an hour earlier to go home, so I took the bus, because I got off work 30 minutes later, it took an hour to get home but that hour was my alone time,  I would listen to classical music on my portable transistor  radio with an ear bud, and the station I listened to always had music to commute home by, it worked for me)

Water is the element that will calm an Empath’s emotions, a sea salt bath will clear negative energy as well as ocean air and water.  ( I used to go camping every year with my folk and there was this wonder place that had a river running by and all the ions from that river was refreshing,  I’ve always found being near moving water to help me feel great,  I’m fortunate that I live not too far from an ocean beach, so I get either one of my children or my niece to drive me to it, and I’ll sit in my folding chair enjoying the waves, the sea gulls and the fresh air)

Another thing is to create a room of your own, either your bedroom or porch or finish off a basement area so that it is your space decorate it the way you want.   
 My nephew set up in my sitting room (it’s an odd room that no one has an idea what its used for it’s a bit too small for a bed room, so I keep my books and papers there and do my bills)  he set up an aquarium and asked me what type of fish did I want in it and I said “Goldfish”  so we went to this place and I picked out my fish, he maintains the aquarium and I enjoy the meditative aspects of the fish swimming around, while my stereo plays classical music.   But you have to let others know that is YOUR room, no others can invade it or put their stuff in it, it is to help balance you.

That is at least one idea, but you now know for those of you who are sensitive what it is all about and what you can do about it.

Bright Blessings,
Ms. Q


  1. Ms. Q my sincerest thank you for this clear explanation and all your time writing these informative pieces.

    1. You are very welcome, I'm glad you enjoy them.

      Bright Blessings,
      Ms. Q